Friends and Socializing

I wasn't sure how to title this post. Socializing is not my strong suit. I think I'm funny and I have opinions, but when I'm around people, I feel claustrophobic. I often try to prepare before a social event, but as soon as I open my mouth, I regret what I say. It really stinks. Maybe I'm being paranoid, but I just feel so awkward. I keep wondering if I should keep trying or just keep my mouth closed. I think my biggest hurdle is not worrying about what other people think. When I do share my opinion, and I get the slightest resistance, I panic. I can't even explain how I feel when I deal with someone aggressive. I then become very defensive, but I lash out. Not cool. I want to be a duck and let the negativity roll off my back like water.

Will it happen? I'm working on it. (smile)